The Early Bird Gets The Worm

They say that the early bird gets the worm. I don’t know whoΒ they are, but in my humble opinion, they should mind their own business. I mean, who started this stupid rumor? Was it the birds? If so, I hope they get bird flu.

I completely disagree with this idiom. It implies that people who wake up early, or accomplish things first, will reap all the benefits. That’s bullshit. It’s not advantageous to be the first one up in the morning. Just ask the worm.

The expression is an unfair buzzkill. It assumes that all birds have an equal chance of being up at the crack of dawn, when, in actuality, some birds face additional hardships. For example, there are poverty-stricken birds that can’t afford alarm clocks. They are stuck on bird-feed stamps. They live in cardboard nests.

And on the other end of the spectrum, you’ve got birds with the upper wing. Roosters are always up early. That’s kind of their thing.

In all seriousness, not everyone is a morning person. Some people thrive at night. We shouldn’t have to follow any set schedule. We can accomplish greatness whenever we want.

I don’t want to live in a world where I can only be successful if I wake up at the buttcrack of dawn. I’m always late to everything, and life would never go my way. I’d probably end up with the shittiest job ever. I don’t even know what that would be. It’d probably be some super sketch third-shift job at a nuclear testing facility scrubbing poop off of radioactive toilets. So yes, shitty indeed.

And worst of all, I’d be a loser. I wouldn’t make a name for myself. No one would know my name. They’d call me Hell. They’d call me Stacey. That’s not my name. That’s not my name.

All of this because of a stupid expression about a stupid bird. Sigh. I guess I’ll get over it. It’s not worth the trouble. The early bird can keep his damn worm. I don’t want to eat a nasty ass invertebrate anyway. Call me crazy, but I believe that sleeping-in and having a mediocre existence sounds much better than chomping down on a squirmy, nasty bug.

Unless the worm is gummy.

Leave Comment

Feb 05 5:56 pm

I am an early bird unfortunately, but I can say that I have never understood how people can stay up so late!! πŸ˜› Haha, I love the bit about at least we humans can talk, πŸ™‚

Feb 05 5:37 pm

Why be hsad a custodian job, wearing that extremely attractive full body plumbing suit.
OKAY maybe custodians don't wear those, but they should πŸ˜›
ahha 'hope you get bird flu'
lovelyy xD

haha not really. she said all people sin. She called me a sinner too πŸ˜›
That is incredibly true.
They'll all die off and like all other groups rights gay rights will be put in place.
In Civics the first thing we had to do was distinguish the group of people facing the hardest time globally.
Why can't I have one?
haha ohh canada πŸ˜›

yes overmindedness!
All sorts of people rights are moving forward. πŸ˜€

Feb 05 5:35 pm

Thanks. XD
Heh-heh. Bird flu.
Alarm clocks were invented by the person in the morning with nothihng better to do.

Feb 05 4:24 pm

I like how you related your whole post to the early bird catches the worm. πŸ˜€ anyway, it's been awhile since we've talked.

Feb 05 3:27 pm

I am so not an early bird, which is why I always set my alarm clock 15 minutes ahead so that if I DO procrastinate I would still have enough time in the morning to get ready.
I like my worms chewy and sour. XD

Feb 05 2:55 pm

so, i am so not an early bird at all, not by all means, i am so cranky in the morning, gah~ :O looks like we're in the same boat.

Feb 05 1:53 pm

hahaha, I feel the same way as you. Even with coffee, I still have trouble staying awake. I like worms when they're colorful and fruity πŸ™‚

Marie Claire
Feb 05 1:38 pm

I hate getting up early… I think I'll stick to the same job as you πŸ˜›
Sleeping is one of the best things in life… forget the worm!

Feb 05 1:37 pm

Lol yeaahhh, straight guys cant go long without a girl (:
Sorry about the forwarding to the grvatar site, i dont kno why it was doing that.
Hopefully it wont happen again.
Dont worry you arent the only one who can get up in time.
I always find myself running around like a duck with its head cut off rushing to catch my bus in the morning.
Lmao i agree , worms are pooey and gross. I cry when i see them ….

Feb 05 1:01 pm

I have to be up at 4:30 in the morning on Saturdays (and 5:30 on Sundays) to open at work so that makes me an early bird every day of the week. Not by choice though. However, most of the time, I feel like the early worm who gets eaten by the early bird.

And as for your comment, the orange may look very promising from bird's eye view… then, you'll realize that it's actually an apple. Seeing things from a bird's eye view can be very deceiving. I say… be hungry for a banana!

Feb 05 11:23 am

Yeah, Bob the Builder's a great singer. I went to a party and the DJ ignored my request of Bob the Builder because it's childish. How mean.

I've been sleeping in all week so someone else has been eating my worm. Power to them, they can have it. πŸ™‚ You should never say that to children as it's no way of motivating them to get out of bed. The new version should be 'Sleep in and you can eat all the nice food you like.'


Feb 05 9:39 am

Urgh. I'm not an early bird, but I'm made to be one for stupid school. YES, I'm still in secondary/high school :(. I seriously despise it. I have to get up at 7:00 am :(. Luls. Thanks, and yeah, I might just add some peepee to my site =P

– Vincent

Feb 05 8:16 am

Agreed. I am NOT an early bird. Sleeping in is much better πŸ™‚

Feb 05 6:50 am

Yeah. I'm a early bird but def not by choice. I hate getting up in the morning. It's a drag.

Feb 05 4:31 am

Haha, what are chucks? I’m looking at nikes.. maybe like these.. http://www.shoelowdown.com/image



But our uniform is blue, so I dunno πŸ˜›

love mario party! I always lost that game though πŸ™ My brother always won, EVIL.

I had a hard test today too! A stupid science test on chemical reactions πŸ™ argg. What was your test on?

I’m an early bird.. and I don’t eve like worms.. not even the sour ones πŸ™‚

Your blogs are so interesting πŸ˜›



My name is Justin, and you've stumbled upon my home on the web. From writing and coding to theater and cosplay, I'm always up to something. I haven’t been myself ever since I was born.

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