The Early Bird Gets The Worm

They say that the early bird gets the worm. I don’t know who they are, but in my humble opinion, they should mind their own business. I mean, who started this stupid rumor? Was it the birds? If so, I hope they get bird flu.

I completely disagree with this idiom. It implies that people who wake up early, or accomplish things first, will reap all the benefits. That’s bullshit. It’s not advantageous to be the first one up in the morning. Just ask the worm.

The expression is an unfair buzzkill. It assumes that all birds have an equal chance of being up at the crack of dawn, when, in actuality, some birds face additional hardships. For example, there are poverty-stricken birds that can’t afford alarm clocks. They are stuck on bird-feed stamps. They live in cardboard nests.

And on the other end of the spectrum, you’ve got birds with the upper wing. Roosters are always up early. That’s kind of their thing.

In all seriousness, not everyone is a morning person. Some people thrive at night. We shouldn’t have to follow any set schedule. We can accomplish greatness whenever we want.

I don’t want to live in a world where I can only be successful if I wake up at the buttcrack of dawn. I’m always late to everything, and life would never go my way. I’d probably end up with the shittiest job ever. I don’t even know what that would be. It’d probably be some super sketch third-shift job at a nuclear testing facility scrubbing poop off of radioactive toilets. So yes, shitty indeed.

And worst of all, I’d be a loser. I wouldn’t make a name for myself. No one would know my name. They’d call me Hell. They’d call me Stacey. That’s not my name. That’s not my name.

All of this because of a stupid expression about a stupid bird. Sigh. I guess I’ll get over it. It’s not worth the trouble. The early bird can keep his damn worm. I don’t want to eat a nasty ass invertebrate anyway. Call me crazy, but I believe that sleeping-in and having a mediocre existence sounds much better than chomping down on a squirmy, nasty bug.

Unless the worm is gummy.

Leave Comment

Kat - Kat
Feb 09 1:51 am

Hahahahaha ~ that was hilarious! hahahaha :))

and OMG! So I'm a poor bird coz I don't wake up early. LOL ^_^

btw, yeah, I applied for your affiliates, mind to?? 🙂 just let me know if you want to ^_^

Feb 09 12:32 am

Eearly birds are tired all day and waste their lives on carreers when there's so much more fun things out there!

Feb 08 8:37 pm

Ugh I couldn't solve the code that the insane guy gave…

Feb 08 7:02 pm

Err… Let me see if I can put it clearer than I did in the first place.

Say a male friend of yours has a girlfriend.
And this friend refers to his 'girlfriend' as his 'bird' instead? Just another term for girlfriend really.

Is that used where you live?

Feb 08 5:06 pm

i hope you mean high on life o_o…

Feb 08 3:23 pm

I hate waking up early. I see no point in dragging your body out of bed, when you could easily have a good day with more sleep. I hate the cliche sleeping ways of life, haha.

Feb 08 3:21 pm

haha. thats good.

Feb 08 3:04 pm

idr if i cmted this before so if this is a second cmt ur SUPER LUCKY. im only spending about 20 minutes cmting blogs. lol no aim.. i would get distracted. lol and yea i should pur your veriosn of it i were a boy=]

Feb 08 1:29 pm

Yeah, unfortunately the early bird does get the worm. 🙁 I've noticed whenever I wake up early, my entire day goes well. When I wake up late and I'm not on time for anything my entire day is just crap. So, yeah, unfortunately it's all true. I'm really good at being on time for most things, but I still could use some work, haha.

Feb 08 12:23 pm

Ohsnap, french and calculuss dont sound too fun.
I have math, english business and science ( all rlly hard D: )

Feb 08 12:03 pm

haha stupid bird. I know what you're feeling~
hah, yes…yes I did just mention you in my blog an you are just amazing xD.
Ha, thanks. I tried to do a video of the tutorials, but I didn't sound so serious. I kept laughing and then the camera would get all…bah it was just bad, ha.

Feb 08 11:13 am

truuuue .
what subjects are you taking ?

Feb 08 11:00 am

You probably had fun though. Come on, Am i right?!?


Feb 08 10:41 am

Yea, good thing I'm alive, right?! *wink wink* ROFL. Yes, I am. Yay.. ._. LOL.

Feb 08 10:28 am

Lmao well in a simpler way : I DO NOTTTT HAVE A DING A LING.
It was my friend whos a boy whos ding a ling got exposedddd. As for me, im scarred for life.
Im not up to much, i have to get down to whole bunch of hmk how about you ?


My name is Justin, and you've stumbled upon my home on the web. From writing and coding to theater and cosplay, I'm always up to something. I haven’t been myself ever since I was born.

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