The Truth In Advertising

The marketing industry has its fair share of bullshit. From “Do-Nothing” infomercials to self-proclaimed “Gurus,” businesses are always plotting to beat you up and take your lunch money.

Well personally, I think it’s time to wake up and smell the coffee. If people are begging you for cash, they clearly don’t know how to get rich fast.

And while we’re at it, there’s no such thing as getting a free iPhone. If time is money, then 50 billion hours of online surveys is not free.

Yes, I’ll concede that there’s some truth in advertising. Hell, I’ll even say that pharmaceutical commercials are too honest. I mean, have you ever even see those commercials? They start off okay with a breezy montage of people who now have something to live for, but then you’re suddenly socked with a full list of cautions…

“RELAXOFT may cause nose bleeds, baldness, memory loss, swollen ankles, facial boils, excessive earwax, uncontrollable cursing, an urge to play in the mud, road-rage, snoring while awake, lying under oath, atheism, and a desire to spit at small pets.”

Well shit. Next time, I think I’ll just take the headache.

And all of these unintended side-effects make for some bizarre interactions. Like, if I wake up one morning feeling sick, and my significant other tries to give me medicine, should I fight him? Should I slap it out of his hand? Like, the medicine probably caused the sickness in the first place. It certainly won’t make me pill better.

And yes, while I gave pharmaceutical commercials credit for being somewhat honest, they’re not entirely off the hook. In many other ways, they’re just as confusing and misleading. For instance, they’re usually featuring scenes that have absolutely nothing to do with the product.

Vagisil commercials have girls doing cheerleading routines. Male enhancement commercials have guys playing golf. Every herpes commercials can be summed up as: “I have herpes.” “I don’t.” “Let’s ride bicycles.”

When it comes to medication, I don’t pay much attention to the advertisements. It’s best to let the doctors decide what’s right for me. They usually know what they’re talking about. Well, emphasis on usually. I once had a doctor whose office plants were always dead. I couldn’t help but wonder if I could trust him with myย life.

Leave Comment

Jun 29 3:30 pm

A lot of those side effects vary, but I agree, after hearing all that, I'll just keep whatever I have and let it go away naturally, lol.

lmao @ RELAXOFT side effects. xD

p.s. I added you as an affiliate. =p

Jun 29 11:14 am

Sorry about the form, my email was down since Thursday. But sure I'd love to be affiliates! I will add you later.

And those medicine commercials are so wierd.. I always am left wondering what their marketing team was thinking? Chris Rock had a funny bit on those commercials from his stand up routine Bigger & Blacker. They always try to find something until they have you! Like do you sleep at nighy and wake up in the morning? hahah

Jide Salu
Jun 29 9:24 am

What do I deserve to have had a comment from you? WOW!!!
After coming on this site and seeing 117 comments and still going, I must now regard myself as a mini blogger celebrity…loll

YOUR COMMENT: "For a while, I had a doctor whose office plants were always dead. How the hell was I supposed to trust him with my life?" – IS A CLASSIC

On medication, what do the doctors know? Spending all those years at medic-school only to end up telling us what we already knew.

I must come back here and thanks for dropping by…

Chynna Ashley
Jun 29 4:54 am

Doctors in England are shite. They give you antibiotics for EVERYTHING. I bet if you crawled into the surgery and you collapsed and your guts were hanging out and all sorts they would just say, "Take this pills twice a day for two weeks" :| STUPID.
I would definitely want to be affiliates with you ๐Ÿ™‚ I'll add you to the list after I post this comment.

Jun 29 4:34 am

I think I might wait for the tutorial and then put you under the tutorial credits rather make a new section called 'People I stole codes from… with permission of course.'

Oh and we found out as Purple slipped up and went 'Oh I don't want to see that film, I hated the first one.'

Jun 29 2:55 am

I so agree!!! a)Medicine should be done by doctors because other stuff can be riskful.
Other then that I don't know how to respond to this post, I agree with you. Alot of stuff is useless or has no point. A lot of radio adds are like that here where I come from.
Anyways in other news I can't say I have never left the country, because I went to the USA before but this is my first trip without my parents XD

Jun 28 8:42 pm

How do you doing?~
U know , just today i read ur biography and really is sooo good know you a bit better ^0^
Aww you are sooo popular hahaha

Jun 28 8:06 pm

LMAO…… Oh my gosh, I think I've seen the herpes commercial you speak of!! I thought the EXACT same thing. XD Hahaha… Man, them's some crazy-pointless commercials out there, huh…

I dunno though, I suppose it all depends on said advertising. I've seen wholly legitimate ads before; they're just few and far in between these days. ๐Ÿ˜› Can never be too careful, that's for sure..

Jun 28 7:52 pm

Hi! ๐Ÿ™‚
Just wanted to tell you that I'm leaving for Sweden, and I'll be staying there for a week so sorry if I don't manage to comment your blogs meanwhile 'cause I don't think that internet will work there..
takecare ๐Ÿ™‚

Jun 28 7:16 pm

Lol, like those stupid yellow and red ads telling you that you are the 1 millionth visitor to visit the site… and it's only new. I spot a free survey ad!
I like how you talk about funny rants instead of your day, I'll try that sometime! My posts are boring.

Jun 28 4:34 pm

Hi ๐Ÿ™‚
Didn't manage to add you before now 'cause my computer kinda broke down.
You're up in my list now though ๐Ÿ˜€

Jun 28 2:46 pm

Darn, I didn't see the only letters thing, so I typed a zero instead of an "o" and I lost my comment. Pretty much I said…

Haha yeah, I remembere your tweet. I was like YEAH because I had been thinking the exact same thing.

LOL that reminds me of this commercial that I saw last night when I was babysitting. This lady came on and was like "in our last [insert drug name] commercial, we realize that we were not entirely clear." Then she went on to list potential side-effects for the full minute. It was really wtf-y.

Jun 28 2:29 pm

No i didn't get it to work :/ I am still playing about with it. i am most likely doing something wrong. I normally do. Grrr.

How has you weekend been? i saw twitter and saw you have possibly one of the best days of your life this weekend. What happened? Your boyfriend proposed or something? That would be majorly sweet if he did.

Jun 28 2:17 pm

Uh oh! That's not good.

Jun 28 1:41 pm

my site is not really about blogging its about graphics and stuff lol
sure i'll add you later i dont have my ftp in this laptop (:


My name is Justin, and you've stumbled upon my home on the web. From writing and coding to theater and cosplay, I'm always up to something. I havenโ€™t been myself ever since I was born.

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